My new one hour special, “Cult Classic” is out on YouTube! Everyone’s talking about it, and we’re all very excited about it over here at headquarters.

Normally I would write a clever essay or love poem, but today I’m mixing it up. Today my new album “Comedy To Fall Asleep To” premiers on SiriusXM at noon and 3 PM EST on Laugh USA (AND YOU CAN LISTEN, yes YOU). I decided to give it the name “Comedy To Fall Asleep To” because of all the die hard fans who have messaged me over the years saying things like, “I love your albums, I play them all the time when I’m having trouble falling asleep at night.”

Three bird posts in a row? Wow! Please enjoy this amazing stand-up skit from a recent show at Acme in Minneapolis. PLUS… a few upcoming tour dates.

I hope no one reads this because I would be embarrassed by how excited I am about seeing eleven (count them eleven) new birds. Yes, I had a huge swing in my eBird account from 84 total bird species to 95, and to think just four months ago I had zero. Absolutely incredible.

Well it’s official, five weeks into my new life as a birdwatcher I’ve been reprimanded by a bird scientist from the Cornell Lab of Ornithology. It was bound to happen, I just never imagined it would happen so soon.

That’s right, in the face of the data and all of the odds, not to mention my complete lack of financial acumen, I am convinced I will crush the benchmarks, and the mutual fund managers. But first, some context…

If you are one of the ninety-trillion people who watched this viral video of Dixie the giggling fox running off with an iPhone, and it brought you joy —but like me you wondered if it brought you too much joy— then you came to the right place.

Today I’d like to talk about the Valero gasoline corporation and their latest commercial in which they share the heart warming story of how they saved Ducky the dog, on the day he was set to be euthanized.

This week i’m watching “The Vow” on HBO about the Nxivm cult. I feel stupid spelling it the way they spell it, but I also feel stupid spelling it differently.

Dear Nation: It is with great humility that I write my first blog. I will try to stay humble as the nation gets shocked. Though I admit it will be difficult (to stay humble).